Hi everyone,
Never in a million years would I have thought that I would be up in front of church talking to many, many people. Let alone volunteer to do it! I am still amazed that I wasn’t very nervous. Today God gave me the words that He wanted said and gave me the calmness to do it. I received very insightful words from a friend of my sisters (thanks again Mitch!) that said God does not ask for our ability, but only our avail”ability”. I am more than happy to do what God tells me to do but I do have to admit some days I am thinking “you want me to do what?!”.
Well, tomorrow brings round three of chemo. We will be meeting with the doctor at 9:00 and after that we go downtown for the chemo. At this appointment he will discuss the results of the stomach port and where my treatment should go from here. We have our opinion of where we would like to go and are praying that the doctor’s is the same.
I am so thankful for all of you and your prayers and all the help you offer. Emily will be shuffled between a couple different places this week and I know she will do great. We really appreciate all of you that help us with the kids during this week after chemo. The chemo knocks me down hard and I have a difficult time functioning on my own let alone taking care of the children. This is an especially hard week for Brian as he sees me at my worst and takes over all of the daily routines at home. I don’t know what I would do without him. Today was a huge emotional high for me and I will cling to that during this next week.
Please pray for:
Anyone that met God through my words today – that they will take that next step to finding out more about this awesome God we have!
Tomorrow’s appointment with the doctor – that we will all be on the same page with the treatment
The kids as they have a hard time seeing me so tired and not able to do anything with them
Brian as deals with the every day tasks and wipes away my tears and is my shiny hero
My CA125 level will be checked tomorrow – the normal count is 35. It was at 380 at my last round of chemo. Let’s pray that the last chemo blasted it right down to 35!
My parents are coming back from Mexico on Thursday (woohoo!!). Please pray that their last days there will continue to be peaceful and relaxing and that they will have a safe trip home.
Thank you again for your unending prayers and amazing support that you have shown our family during this trial.
Love,
Kristi
Sunday, April 22, 2007
Thursday, April 19, 2007
Thursday, April 19, 2007: Good News
bkrogalske@sbcglobal.net
04/19/2007 10:55 PM
Hi everyone,
My nurse called this afternoon and my platelet count went from 28,000 to 113,000!!!! This is obviously an answer to many prayers!! I was stunned. So, no more blood tests until Monday – woohoo!!! My veins did a happy dance after hearing that! This also means I can do chemo on Monday. They don’t have the results of the distribution test yet (to know whether or not they can use my stomach port). I did have some swelling where they injected the dye on Tuesday night. After lying down for ½ hour the swelling went away. He thinks this was a possible leakage in the tube and my doctor is concerned about that. If the chemo leaks out it would be dangerous. My nurse doesn’t think that the doctor will want to do the stomach port with this round of chemo. I have decided that I do not want to do the stomach port this round, regardless of what he says. Thank goodness for patient rights! I am feeling very confident that the cancer is gone but still feel that we should do one more round of chemo (only in my chest port). After this round, the plan is to do the surgery to reverse my colostomy (woohoo again!!!!!!) and at that time they can check to see if there is any cancer (so they can see with their eyes what I believe in my heart) and also check to see how the stomach port is doing.
I have been on such an emotional high since Wednesday afternoon and it has been wonderful. My faith has grown stronger as my prayers have grown bolder. I do realize that we still have obstacles to overcome but for right now I am asking that if it is God’s will, He remove this cancer. I asked my nurse if they have had any miracle healings at their office and she said they had and that they would love to have more so I told her that I will be their next one. All your prayers are moving mountains for me!
I have been wanting to share my testimony for quite some time but hadn’t gotten up the nerve to ask our minister about it. I e-mailed him last night to let him know that I would be willing to do that whenever he thought was appropriate and I have been asked to share it this Sunday. I am so excited and thrilled to be able to do this! So many people are out there that don’t receive these e-mails and the only thing they know about me is that I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer and am receiving chemo. We all know there is so much more to the story! I have such a purpose in life now and look forward to shining and sharing. For those of you who don’t know me, I have always been a quiet person, even painfully shy in high school. So, this is as about as far out of my comfort zone as I can go and yet I’m not feeling nervous. Okay, so maybe a little bit! But I am confident that God will give me the right words so that I can shine and show many people how great and powerful God is!
Continuing to shine,
Kristi
04/19/2007 10:55 PM
Hi everyone,
My nurse called this afternoon and my platelet count went from 28,000 to 113,000!!!! This is obviously an answer to many prayers!! I was stunned. So, no more blood tests until Monday – woohoo!!! My veins did a happy dance after hearing that! This also means I can do chemo on Monday. They don’t have the results of the distribution test yet (to know whether or not they can use my stomach port). I did have some swelling where they injected the dye on Tuesday night. After lying down for ½ hour the swelling went away. He thinks this was a possible leakage in the tube and my doctor is concerned about that. If the chemo leaks out it would be dangerous. My nurse doesn’t think that the doctor will want to do the stomach port with this round of chemo. I have decided that I do not want to do the stomach port this round, regardless of what he says. Thank goodness for patient rights! I am feeling very confident that the cancer is gone but still feel that we should do one more round of chemo (only in my chest port). After this round, the plan is to do the surgery to reverse my colostomy (woohoo again!!!!!!) and at that time they can check to see if there is any cancer (so they can see with their eyes what I believe in my heart) and also check to see how the stomach port is doing.
I have been on such an emotional high since Wednesday afternoon and it has been wonderful. My faith has grown stronger as my prayers have grown bolder. I do realize that we still have obstacles to overcome but for right now I am asking that if it is God’s will, He remove this cancer. I asked my nurse if they have had any miracle healings at their office and she said they had and that they would love to have more so I told her that I will be their next one. All your prayers are moving mountains for me!
I have been wanting to share my testimony for quite some time but hadn’t gotten up the nerve to ask our minister about it. I e-mailed him last night to let him know that I would be willing to do that whenever he thought was appropriate and I have been asked to share it this Sunday. I am so excited and thrilled to be able to do this! So many people are out there that don’t receive these e-mails and the only thing they know about me is that I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer and am receiving chemo. We all know there is so much more to the story! I have such a purpose in life now and look forward to shining and sharing. For those of you who don’t know me, I have always been a quiet person, even painfully shy in high school. So, this is as about as far out of my comfort zone as I can go and yet I’m not feeling nervous. Okay, so maybe a little bit! But I am confident that God will give me the right words so that I can shine and show many people how great and powerful God is!
Continuing to shine,
Kristi
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
Tuesday, April 17, 2007: Our 14th Wedding Anniversary:
What an anniversary to remember!! We arrived at Blodgett at 10:00 AM for our distribution study. When we first arrived they seemed quite confused as to why we were there. They took her back at one point for the CT scan then took her back out because they were supposed to do some blood work first. Oopsie. They were just plain confused and unorganized! After the registration and the “almost scan”, it was just a waiting game. Kristi went in for the distribution study and was complete by 12:30PM. So we had a nice lunch on our way back home, drove through our old trailer park (eek!), and got home about 3:00PM.
Oh, but wait. The Dr. called about 2:20 according to my Dad. So Kristi called him back. They messed up the scan and wanted us to come back. So, back to Blodgett we go! We went back to Blodgett and they repeated the entire process all over. While at Blodgett, I got a call from Steve Dozeman, who was watching Mom and Dad’s house while they were in Mexico. There was a water leak in the basement and about an inch of water on the floor!! The sump pump came unattached from a pipe and was pumping water into the basement. So after getting home from the hospital the 2nd time I went over to their house and fixed the cracked check valve and cleaned up. I called Denny to help me and we cleaned until about 10:30PM. What a day!
Here it is in Kristi's words...
bkrogalske@sbcglobal.net
04/17/2007 10:30 PM
Hello everyone,
What a day! There were a lot of mix-ups and confusion. We’ve learned to expect the unexpected! I did pass the blood test this morning – my platelet count was 28 (it needed to be over 25). I had the dye put into my stomach port and then had a cat scan. We had a nice lunch at On The Border and got home around 2:30. Unfortunately the cat scan didn’t go low enough on my abdomen and they needed me to come back. So, back we went. They tried another cat scan but the dye had already gotten out of my system so back to the beginning we went. The put more dye in and back to the cat scan I went. This time the doctor looked at the results before we left. Many other things went wrong along the way as well. On the way back to the hospital I was praying that I wouldn’t need to have more dye put in (as it wasn’t a fun experience). This wasn’t the plan though. However, I did have a peace during the procedure and was joking with the doctor and nurses. Everyone was extremely apologetic and felt awful for everything that went wrong. They thanked me for my understanding and wonderful attitude. So, as Brian said, the purpose of having to return was to "shine" some light on these doctors and nurses. I felt very good on the way home and at peace.
I had to call my doctor tonight because I had some swelling where they put the dye in. Apparently this isn’t uncommon. After laying down for ½ hour the swelling went away. While I was on the phone, my doctor expressed a lot of concern about the hit that my platelet count took after the last round of chemo. I have to go in on Thursday to have my blood drawn (I get tomorrow off!!!). They will be calling me with the results. It is possible that I may not be able to have chemo next week because it is still so low. I am torn over this because although the thought of not having chemo sounds wonderful, I also know that I need the chemo.
I am continuing to pray boldly that I will be cured of this now. After praying last night and simply letting it go, I got the best nights sleep I had in a long time. I know that God has a plan for me. I don’t know that it is to take this cancer from me now but I am feeling compelled to ask that of Him. I pray that this is His will for me but I also know that if this is not His will than He has another plan that is even better than mine. I asked today that I wouldn’t have to go through the procedure of putting the dye in my port but as I said, that wasn’t the plan. Instead, God restored my peace and I have no anger over the confusion of the day. I know His way is better than mine.
Ironically, today was Brian and my 14th wedding anniversary. Although I don’t recommend celebrating your anniversary at the hospital, I am glad that I got to spend the day with him. One thing the cancer has done is brought us closer than I ever thought imaginable. I hope this doesn’t sound corny, but he is my knight in shining armor.
Well, I didn’t mean to e-mail your ear off. Just wanted to keep you posted. I don’t know how we would get through this without all of you. What an amazing support system we have! Here are some specifics for prayers . . .
*focus on one day at a time, one test at a time, one minute at a time
*my blood counts will sky rocket!
*I will continue to stay healthy and free of infection
*praise for safe travels today and the opportunity to "shine" in a hospital that wasn’t having a very good day
*continued feeling of peace – it is so amazing when you surrender completely to God and have that peace
I think that is it for now. Thank you!!!
Love & Hugs,
Kristi
Oh, but wait. The Dr. called about 2:20 according to my Dad. So Kristi called him back. They messed up the scan and wanted us to come back. So, back to Blodgett we go! We went back to Blodgett and they repeated the entire process all over. While at Blodgett, I got a call from Steve Dozeman, who was watching Mom and Dad’s house while they were in Mexico. There was a water leak in the basement and about an inch of water on the floor!! The sump pump came unattached from a pipe and was pumping water into the basement. So after getting home from the hospital the 2nd time I went over to their house and fixed the cracked check valve and cleaned up. I called Denny to help me and we cleaned until about 10:30PM. What a day!
Here it is in Kristi's words...
bkrogalske@sbcglobal.net
04/17/2007 10:30 PM
Hello everyone,
What a day! There were a lot of mix-ups and confusion. We’ve learned to expect the unexpected! I did pass the blood test this morning – my platelet count was 28 (it needed to be over 25). I had the dye put into my stomach port and then had a cat scan. We had a nice lunch at On The Border and got home around 2:30. Unfortunately the cat scan didn’t go low enough on my abdomen and they needed me to come back. So, back we went. They tried another cat scan but the dye had already gotten out of my system so back to the beginning we went. The put more dye in and back to the cat scan I went. This time the doctor looked at the results before we left. Many other things went wrong along the way as well. On the way back to the hospital I was praying that I wouldn’t need to have more dye put in (as it wasn’t a fun experience). This wasn’t the plan though. However, I did have a peace during the procedure and was joking with the doctor and nurses. Everyone was extremely apologetic and felt awful for everything that went wrong. They thanked me for my understanding and wonderful attitude. So, as Brian said, the purpose of having to return was to "shine" some light on these doctors and nurses. I felt very good on the way home and at peace.
I had to call my doctor tonight because I had some swelling where they put the dye in. Apparently this isn’t uncommon. After laying down for ½ hour the swelling went away. While I was on the phone, my doctor expressed a lot of concern about the hit that my platelet count took after the last round of chemo. I have to go in on Thursday to have my blood drawn (I get tomorrow off!!!). They will be calling me with the results. It is possible that I may not be able to have chemo next week because it is still so low. I am torn over this because although the thought of not having chemo sounds wonderful, I also know that I need the chemo.
I am continuing to pray boldly that I will be cured of this now. After praying last night and simply letting it go, I got the best nights sleep I had in a long time. I know that God has a plan for me. I don’t know that it is to take this cancer from me now but I am feeling compelled to ask that of Him. I pray that this is His will for me but I also know that if this is not His will than He has another plan that is even better than mine. I asked today that I wouldn’t have to go through the procedure of putting the dye in my port but as I said, that wasn’t the plan. Instead, God restored my peace and I have no anger over the confusion of the day. I know His way is better than mine.
Ironically, today was Brian and my 14th wedding anniversary. Although I don’t recommend celebrating your anniversary at the hospital, I am glad that I got to spend the day with him. One thing the cancer has done is brought us closer than I ever thought imaginable. I hope this doesn’t sound corny, but he is my knight in shining armor.
Well, I didn’t mean to e-mail your ear off. Just wanted to keep you posted. I don’t know how we would get through this without all of you. What an amazing support system we have! Here are some specifics for prayers . . .
*focus on one day at a time, one test at a time, one minute at a time
*my blood counts will sky rocket!
*I will continue to stay healthy and free of infection
*praise for safe travels today and the opportunity to "shine" in a hospital that wasn’t having a very good day
*continued feeling of peace – it is so amazing when you surrender completely to God and have that peace
I think that is it for now. Thank you!!!
Love & Hugs,
Kristi
Monday, April 16, 2007
Monday, April 16, 2007: My Head's Going To Explode!
bkrogalske@sbcglobal.net
04/16/2007 09:32 PM
Hi everyone,
I have so much going on in my head right now that I’m not sure where to start. I hope I don’t just blab on and on and confuse you. I’ll do my best! Our life has been such an emotional roller coaster lately. I had my blood drawn yesterday and today. My platelet count dropped to 26,000 on Sunday. They said it is normal to spike and then drop after a transfusion. I have to go into the lab tomorrow at Blodgett Hospital before my distribution test. If my platelets go down to 25,000 they will postpone the test. I can’t remember why but I remember it making sense when she told me. Basically right now it’s a day by day watching my blood levels kind of thing. If the numbers don’t start going up I won’t be able to have chemo next week either.
I have been struggling with how to pray lately. I know I have encouraged you to pray boldly that I will defeat this cancer. Lately I have been feeling like I need to step it up a notch. I am asking for a miracle. I want this cancer gone and I want it gone now! Part of me has felt selfish about this but I keep getting nudges that this is what I should ask for. So, I am asking you to join with me in praying boldly that this cancer flees from my body. God is more powerful than any chemo and any doctor.
I know I usually end with specifics but right now I am only asking that we pray together boldly for this miracle. I know God is up to something big here and I can’t wait to see what it is!
Love,
Kristi
04/16/2007 09:32 PM
Hi everyone,
I have so much going on in my head right now that I’m not sure where to start. I hope I don’t just blab on and on and confuse you. I’ll do my best! Our life has been such an emotional roller coaster lately. I had my blood drawn yesterday and today. My platelet count dropped to 26,000 on Sunday. They said it is normal to spike and then drop after a transfusion. I have to go into the lab tomorrow at Blodgett Hospital before my distribution test. If my platelets go down to 25,000 they will postpone the test. I can’t remember why but I remember it making sense when she told me. Basically right now it’s a day by day watching my blood levels kind of thing. If the numbers don’t start going up I won’t be able to have chemo next week either.
I have been struggling with how to pray lately. I know I have encouraged you to pray boldly that I will defeat this cancer. Lately I have been feeling like I need to step it up a notch. I am asking for a miracle. I want this cancer gone and I want it gone now! Part of me has felt selfish about this but I keep getting nudges that this is what I should ask for. So, I am asking you to join with me in praying boldly that this cancer flees from my body. God is more powerful than any chemo and any doctor.
I know I usually end with specifics but right now I am only asking that we pray together boldly for this miracle. I know God is up to something big here and I can’t wait to see what it is!
Love,
Kristi
Saturday, April 14, 2007
Saturday, April 14, 2007: Courage to Shine!
Wow, what a surprise. Two friends stopped by with a couple of gifts. It was Emily's birthday so we thought they were just gifts for her. Little did we know! We had Emily open the first gift (thinking it was for her) and discovered five orange t-shirts. We opened the next gift which was a huge matted frame with signatures filling in every single white spot. These were people who had bought a Courage to Shine t-shirt as part of a fund raiser for us. Along with this was a letter explaining the fund raiser that was done on our behalf. We were speechless. I can't explain the feeling of freedom this gave us. The stress of the mounting medical bills was taken away.
bkrogalske@sbcglobal.net
04/14/2007 10:00 PM
Okay so I knew you were all awesome prayer warriors but I didn’t know how sneaky you were! We were blessed this morning with five beautiful bright orange t-shirts, a beautiful frame filled with encouraging words and signatures and an extremely generous check! I’m at a loss for words. Tears took place of our words this morning as we absorbed what you have all done for us. I felt a huge burden lifted from us both financially and emotionally. We are all in this together and you all have shined back at us so bright we have our sun glasses on! I have to admit this process has been taking a toll on us and what you did for us has reminded us of our purpose in this – to SHINE! I can’t imagine going through this without all of you. There is no way we could ever thank you enough! You’ll never know the impact this had on our family. Thank you for shining with us during this dark time. God’s light is brighter than any darkness. Let’s shine together and show this world just how awesome our God is!!!!
Love & hugs,
Brian, Kristi, Ashley, Nathan & Emily
Friday, April 13, 2007
Friday, April 13, 2007: Great News!
Hey everyone,
Good news! My doctor called tonight and my platelet count is back to normal! I don’t have to have my blood drawn tomorrow but I do need to on Sunday. I’m just glad to get one day off! I will have to have it drawn again on Monday and then they will decide then if I need to continue with the shots for my white blood count. Brian gave me the shot tonight and Nathan even watched. There is a chance of bone pain as a side effect with this shot and fortunately I haven’t gotten that. I am still tired today but getting stronger. Thank you for all your prayers – we can feel them. Please pray that my counts will continue to go up and stay up and that I will stay healthy. Thank you thank you thank you!!!!
Love,
Kristi
Good news! My doctor called tonight and my platelet count is back to normal! I don’t have to have my blood drawn tomorrow but I do need to on Sunday. I’m just glad to get one day off! I will have to have it drawn again on Monday and then they will decide then if I need to continue with the shots for my white blood count. Brian gave me the shot tonight and Nathan even watched. There is a chance of bone pain as a side effect with this shot and fortunately I haven’t gotten that. I am still tired today but getting stronger. Thank you for all your prayers – we can feel them. Please pray that my counts will continue to go up and stay up and that I will stay healthy. Thank you thank you thank you!!!!
Love,
Kristi
Thursday, April 12, 2007
Thursday, April 12, 2007: Just An Update
bkrogalske@sbcglobal.net
04/12/2007 09:20 PM
Hi everyone,
What a crazy week! Fortunately my hives went away and didn’t come back. I had a home health nurse come today. I don’t think I mentioned in yesterday’s e-mail that I need to have a shot every day to stimulate my white blood cell growth. I had one in the hospital and we need to give them at home over the weekend. Brian actually gave me the shot today in my stomach and he loved it! Too crazy. The needle is so small that I don’t even feel it. The nurse was very impressed with him. Add one more thing to his list of many talents! The shots cost over $2000 but fortunately we were able to have our insurance cover it. It only took a couple phone calls and we had to pay $100 out of our own pocket. I don’t know what we would do without insurance!
My parents made it safely to Mexico (hi mom & dad!!!). They will be there for two weeks and are staying with my aunt (my dad’s sister). Please continue to keep them in your prayers that they will be able to relax and have a wonderful well deserved vacation.
I was thinking today that I wish life had a stop button or a pause button. I’d love to rewind and then just hit the fast forward button through this time. It does become overwhelming at times and I wonder how I’ll ever get through. I know I couldn’t do it without my huge network of prayer warriors. You have all been so amazingly supportive and encouraging. Please continue to just cover us in prayers for healing and patience. I see God’s hand at work through this entire experience and that is what keeps me going.
Love,
Kristi
04/12/2007 09:20 PM
Hi everyone,
What a crazy week! Fortunately my hives went away and didn’t come back. I had a home health nurse come today. I don’t think I mentioned in yesterday’s e-mail that I need to have a shot every day to stimulate my white blood cell growth. I had one in the hospital and we need to give them at home over the weekend. Brian actually gave me the shot today in my stomach and he loved it! Too crazy. The needle is so small that I don’t even feel it. The nurse was very impressed with him. Add one more thing to his list of many talents! The shots cost over $2000 but fortunately we were able to have our insurance cover it. It only took a couple phone calls and we had to pay $100 out of our own pocket. I don’t know what we would do without insurance!
My parents made it safely to Mexico (hi mom & dad!!!). They will be there for two weeks and are staying with my aunt (my dad’s sister). Please continue to keep them in your prayers that they will be able to relax and have a wonderful well deserved vacation.
I was thinking today that I wish life had a stop button or a pause button. I’d love to rewind and then just hit the fast forward button through this time. It does become overwhelming at times and I wonder how I’ll ever get through. I know I couldn’t do it without my huge network of prayer warriors. You have all been so amazingly supportive and encouraging. Please continue to just cover us in prayers for healing and patience. I see God’s hand at work through this entire experience and that is what keeps me going.
Love,
Kristi
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Wednesday April 11, 2007: An unexpected visit to Blodgett:
Kristi had just a plain ‘ol follow up visit today with Dr. Downey to check on the I/P port. However, after reviewing her blood levels, he sent her right to the hospital for a platelet transfusion. I got a call from Kristi at work at about 2:15PM. Denny came with me so he could drive my Jeep back. Oh yeah, did I mention it was a blizzard out!! We got 6” of snow today! Yuck!! The overall transfusion process was not really a big deal; just an inconvenience. About half way through however, Kristi came down with an allergic reaction to the platelets. So they had to stop and give her some Benadryl and restart. The overall process only took a few hours and we were home by 7:00. Not too bad. Kristi sent out this e-mail tonight...
bkrogalske@sbcglobal.net
04/11/2007 09:32 PM
Hi everyone,
You know the saying "one step forward, two steps back"? Well, that’s what happened this week. The mammogram results were a great step forward but today we went back. I was at my doctors to have my incision checked from the stomach port. They had my blood test results from yesterday and were concerned about how low my blood count was so they drew it again today while I was there and it had dropped even more. As my doctor put it, my counts are "in the toilet". Because they were so low, I was at risk for an infection and if I should fall and cut myself, I wouldn’t be able to stop the bleeding. So, they sent me to the hospital for a platelet transfusion. (that was step one back). After about 15 minutes into the infusion, I started having an allergic reaction and had hives from head to toe within minutes (step two!). They gave me a dose of benadryl and then continued the transfusion. Thankfully the hives have started disappearing and that was the only reaction I had.
The kids did really well with the last minute changes in their plans for today and we have great friends who stepped in and took care of them for us (thanks Sheryl, Sheri & Karin!!!). Please pray that my counts will start to go up and that I won’t need another transfusion. I will be having a blood test tomorrow and Friday and possibly the weekend as well – depending on the results. They are still planning on having the distribution test next Tuesday morning. We are trying hard to just focus on one step at a time right now.
Please also keep my parents in your prayers. They are leaving on a very early flight tomorrow morning for Mexico for a vacation. I know it is hard for them to go especially with something like this happening. Please pray for safety and that they can just let go and have a great time.
Thanks for your prayers!
Love,
Kristi
bkrogalske@sbcglobal.net
04/11/2007 09:32 PM
Hi everyone,
You know the saying "one step forward, two steps back"? Well, that’s what happened this week. The mammogram results were a great step forward but today we went back. I was at my doctors to have my incision checked from the stomach port. They had my blood test results from yesterday and were concerned about how low my blood count was so they drew it again today while I was there and it had dropped even more. As my doctor put it, my counts are "in the toilet". Because they were so low, I was at risk for an infection and if I should fall and cut myself, I wouldn’t be able to stop the bleeding. So, they sent me to the hospital for a platelet transfusion. (that was step one back). After about 15 minutes into the infusion, I started having an allergic reaction and had hives from head to toe within minutes (step two!). They gave me a dose of benadryl and then continued the transfusion. Thankfully the hives have started disappearing and that was the only reaction I had.
The kids did really well with the last minute changes in their plans for today and we have great friends who stepped in and took care of them for us (thanks Sheryl, Sheri & Karin!!!). Please pray that my counts will start to go up and that I won’t need another transfusion. I will be having a blood test tomorrow and Friday and possibly the weekend as well – depending on the results. They are still planning on having the distribution test next Tuesday morning. We are trying hard to just focus on one step at a time right now.
Please also keep my parents in your prayers. They are leaving on a very early flight tomorrow morning for Mexico for a vacation. I know it is hard for them to go especially with something like this happening. Please pray for safety and that they can just let go and have a great time.
Thanks for your prayers!
Love,
Kristi
Monday, April 9, 2007
Monday, April 9, 2007: More Test Results
Hey everyone – good news! My mammogram today went really well. They looked at the tests right away and couldn’t find anything suspicious at all! They think the spot that was found on the ct scan was possibly a small pool of blood from the surgery I had earlier in the day. Thanks for the prayers – the prayer pager has been quite busy! I am feeling better today and have more energy. I am still having the stomach pains. I have an appointment with my oncologist on Wednesday afternoon as a follow-up for my stomach port surgery. I’m hoping he’ll be able to figure out my stomach pains and how I can make them stop or at least lessen them. My feet still have the neuropathy but not too bad. I am just grateful to have my spring back in my step today. It has been a long week and I hadn’t realized how down I was getting. Pain has a funny way of getting to you. Like Brian said, cancer sucks. I have to agree with him there. Fortunately the blessings have outweighed the burdens. I appreciate all your e-mails and calls and cards that let us know how our situation has impacted your life. What an honor to be used for God’s will. I hate to be short but it’s getting late and I need my beauty sleep!
Love & hugs,
Kristi
Love & hugs,
Kristi
Sunday, April 8, 2007
Sunday, April 8, 2007: Easter
Hello all,
Well, today is Easter. Resurrection Sunday. Today is the day our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, rose from the dead so that we who believe in Him can have everlasting life. What a gift! I hope you all enjoyed your Easter celebrations!
Pastor Frank’s message this morning really hit close to home for our family. It’s a good thing I was working the video camera today because if I was sitting next to Kristi I probably would have started sobbing. The tears were on edge, but the job of running the camera and Jim Geertsma yelling in my headphones was a good distraction. The word picture Pastor Frank used today describing family members sitting around a bed watching a loved one suffer is not just a word picture in this house. I lay in bed every night and watch Kristi suffer. The pain. The nausea. The constant fatigue. "The bag". I save my tears for bed time so Kristi doesn’t have to see them…she has enough to deal with she doesn’t need to see that. We had a tough weekend. Kristi was very fatigued and sore all weekend. It was a miracle in itself that Kristi made it to church this morning. Yesterday she had to miss an Easter celebration and Emily’s birthday party with my family. Imagine as a mother not being able to celebrate your daughter’s 3rd birthday. It hurts. It sucks. Cancer sucks (sorry to be blunt). But rest assured, the tears aren’t tears of surrender. We’re not angry at God, and we’re certainly not giving up. We know that God is using us to spread a message…and we know it’s working. We know God is using Kristi to bring people either closer to God, or in some cases back to God. We know this first hand. We’ve received several e-mails from people from around the world that begin something like this: "You don’t know me, but…". It’s amazing. Incredible. And for that we are excited. But it’s tough. I cry because it’s tough to watch someone I’ve loved for 15+ years suffer from a cruel sickness. It’s easy to get down emotionally when you get fatigued. So I thank Pastor Frank for the reminder this morning…the reminder that Jesus Christ is alive!! Amen.
For those that didn’t know, Kristi’s last CT scan showed an "irregularity" in her right breast. They think the scan just picked up part of her chemo port, but she has to go in to Zeeland Hospital tomorrow for a mammogram to rule any more cancer out. With her already having cancer, of course we’re a little anxious about this. So…
Some specific prayer requests (772-0110):
· Monday’s mammogram is at 12:30. For those women who have had one you know what she is in for. Please pray that the discomfort is minimal and that the "irregularity" is just that, the chemo port, and nothing else. Nada. Zero. Zilch. She won’t get results until mid-end of the week (we think).
· Pray that we will be lifted back up emotionally.
· Kristi’s stomach has been hurting a lot lately. Not sure if it’s just the scar tissue or what. But Kristi is in a lot of discomfort. Pray that the pain gets better in the coming days.
· Kristi continues to struggle with her colostomy bag. It’s a huge hassle. Pray that the bag starts working soon, or better yet, they can reverse it soon.
· Ashley is opening up more and asking more questions. She has been crying a lot at night because she is "scared for mommy". Please pray for comfort and understanding for Ashley.
· Pray that the coming days/weeks give us good rest. We’ve both been struggling lately at getting a good night’s sleep…and for once it hasn’t been the kids keeping us awake – just our minds.
· The support continues to come in ways of not only prayer, but people cleaning our house, our yard, meals, etc. Prayer of thanks for all of this support!
Thanks for all the prayers – we love you all!
Brian
Well, today is Easter. Resurrection Sunday. Today is the day our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, rose from the dead so that we who believe in Him can have everlasting life. What a gift! I hope you all enjoyed your Easter celebrations!
Pastor Frank’s message this morning really hit close to home for our family. It’s a good thing I was working the video camera today because if I was sitting next to Kristi I probably would have started sobbing. The tears were on edge, but the job of running the camera and Jim Geertsma yelling in my headphones was a good distraction. The word picture Pastor Frank used today describing family members sitting around a bed watching a loved one suffer is not just a word picture in this house. I lay in bed every night and watch Kristi suffer. The pain. The nausea. The constant fatigue. "The bag". I save my tears for bed time so Kristi doesn’t have to see them…she has enough to deal with she doesn’t need to see that. We had a tough weekend. Kristi was very fatigued and sore all weekend. It was a miracle in itself that Kristi made it to church this morning. Yesterday she had to miss an Easter celebration and Emily’s birthday party with my family. Imagine as a mother not being able to celebrate your daughter’s 3rd birthday. It hurts. It sucks. Cancer sucks (sorry to be blunt). But rest assured, the tears aren’t tears of surrender. We’re not angry at God, and we’re certainly not giving up. We know that God is using us to spread a message…and we know it’s working. We know God is using Kristi to bring people either closer to God, or in some cases back to God. We know this first hand. We’ve received several e-mails from people from around the world that begin something like this: "You don’t know me, but…". It’s amazing. Incredible. And for that we are excited. But it’s tough. I cry because it’s tough to watch someone I’ve loved for 15+ years suffer from a cruel sickness. It’s easy to get down emotionally when you get fatigued. So I thank Pastor Frank for the reminder this morning…the reminder that Jesus Christ is alive!! Amen.
For those that didn’t know, Kristi’s last CT scan showed an "irregularity" in her right breast. They think the scan just picked up part of her chemo port, but she has to go in to Zeeland Hospital tomorrow for a mammogram to rule any more cancer out. With her already having cancer, of course we’re a little anxious about this. So…
Some specific prayer requests (772-0110):
· Monday’s mammogram is at 12:30. For those women who have had one you know what she is in for. Please pray that the discomfort is minimal and that the "irregularity" is just that, the chemo port, and nothing else. Nada. Zero. Zilch. She won’t get results until mid-end of the week (we think).
· Pray that we will be lifted back up emotionally.
· Kristi’s stomach has been hurting a lot lately. Not sure if it’s just the scar tissue or what. But Kristi is in a lot of discomfort. Pray that the pain gets better in the coming days.
· Kristi continues to struggle with her colostomy bag. It’s a huge hassle. Pray that the bag starts working soon, or better yet, they can reverse it soon.
· Ashley is opening up more and asking more questions. She has been crying a lot at night because she is "scared for mommy". Please pray for comfort and understanding for Ashley.
· Pray that the coming days/weeks give us good rest. We’ve both been struggling lately at getting a good night’s sleep…and for once it hasn’t been the kids keeping us awake – just our minds.
· The support continues to come in ways of not only prayer, but people cleaning our house, our yard, meals, etc. Prayer of thanks for all of this support!
Thanks for all the prayers – we love you all!
Brian
Tuesday, April 3, 2007
Tuesday, April 3, 2007: We're Tired
Hi everyone,
Sorry for such a long delay! This last round of chemo knocked me down pretty hard. Because of the surgery I had a week before chemo, my blood counts were quite low. My body is taking extra long to fight back this time. I also came down with the flu bug on Sunday. Major bummer. After lots of resting Sunday and Monday I am feeling better today. I am still quite weak and tire easily which is very frustrating for me. I have also started having neuropathy in my feet. This is a side effect that typically comes more into the 3rd or 4th round of chemo. My feet are tingly and numb and now I have a pain in my right foot. My nurse said that this should fade. I am also starting to feel it in my hands as well. Right now it is tolerable but I am hoping it fades quickly!
The kids are all healthy and enjoying their spring break. Thanks to many of our friends and family, they have been going to fun places and having a great time! I am so grateful to everyone that has helped with the kids recently as I wasn’t even able to take care of myself. It’s really hard to sit still. God knew I was struggling with this because while I was reading a devotional last night He gave me this verse . . . . You, Lord, will fight for me; help me only to be still . . . which is from Exodus 14:13-14. I love God moments!
We have been so blessed with meals and child care and cards and so much more. I could never say thank you enough. It has been a long battle and we still have a long ways to go but we are still confident that we will defeat this cancer with God’s help. I have many specific prayer requests and am so grateful to all of you who lift them up.
*please pray that the neuropathy in my hands and feet will subside
*continued good health for our family
*I will continue to get stronger every day and my blood counts will rise back on their own
*continued focus on the here and now
* Brian’s getting worn down and tired. Pray for new strength and patience.
*That I will continue to grow in my relationship with God. It is so easy to try and take the wheel and pretend to take control. I miss the closeness that I had with God during my week in the hospital and want to have that back.
*the kids seem to be adjusting to my new "look" and are doing well. Pray that they will continue to grow with us and be open during this time
Thank you!!!!!!
Love,
Kristi
Sorry for such a long delay! This last round of chemo knocked me down pretty hard. Because of the surgery I had a week before chemo, my blood counts were quite low. My body is taking extra long to fight back this time. I also came down with the flu bug on Sunday. Major bummer. After lots of resting Sunday and Monday I am feeling better today. I am still quite weak and tire easily which is very frustrating for me. I have also started having neuropathy in my feet. This is a side effect that typically comes more into the 3rd or 4th round of chemo. My feet are tingly and numb and now I have a pain in my right foot. My nurse said that this should fade. I am also starting to feel it in my hands as well. Right now it is tolerable but I am hoping it fades quickly!
The kids are all healthy and enjoying their spring break. Thanks to many of our friends and family, they have been going to fun places and having a great time! I am so grateful to everyone that has helped with the kids recently as I wasn’t even able to take care of myself. It’s really hard to sit still. God knew I was struggling with this because while I was reading a devotional last night He gave me this verse . . . . You, Lord, will fight for me; help me only to be still . . . which is from Exodus 14:13-14. I love God moments!
We have been so blessed with meals and child care and cards and so much more. I could never say thank you enough. It has been a long battle and we still have a long ways to go but we are still confident that we will defeat this cancer with God’s help. I have many specific prayer requests and am so grateful to all of you who lift them up.
*please pray that the neuropathy in my hands and feet will subside
*continued good health for our family
*I will continue to get stronger every day and my blood counts will rise back on their own
*continued focus on the here and now
* Brian’s getting worn down and tired. Pray for new strength and patience.
*That I will continue to grow in my relationship with God. It is so easy to try and take the wheel and pretend to take control. I miss the closeness that I had with God during my week in the hospital and want to have that back.
*the kids seem to be adjusting to my new "look" and are doing well. Pray that they will continue to grow with us and be open during this time
Thank you!!!!!!
Love,
Kristi
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Tuesday, March 27, 2007: CA125 = 380!
Kristi's CA125 level is down to 380...right on track
2300 - 782 - 380 -??
2300 - 782 - 380 -??
Tuesday March 27, 2007: Chemo Round 2
Chemo days suck. I hate 'em I hate 'em I hate 'em. We tell our kids never to use the word 'hate'. Well, guess what... I HATE 'em...chemo days, not the kids...just to clarify. We arrived at the chemo clinic about 8:45AM. Then for the next 6 hours I just sit and watch as poison is poured into her veins. They say this is helping her. I'm sorry, this just seems like cruel and unusual punishment. Kristi sleeps most of the time. I wish I could say she sleeps 'restfully', but it usually isn't. Her body has a reaction for usually the first hour where she has convulsions and her whole body twitches. She doesn't seem to notice, but I do. Then she just makes a lot of different faces, like winces. I usually just work on my laptop. I switch between my journal and work. There's a TV in the room but it never gets turned on. I usually just play music for Kristi - well, more for me. :)
Tonight it’s parent-teacher conferences, led by the students. Ashley is very excited about this. Hopefully Kristi will be up to going. We got our new CA125 level…380!!!!! This makes it seem a little more tolerable knowing the chemo seems to be doing something.
Yup, Kristi was able to go to conferences tonight. She was tired, but she did great. Everyone was sooo excited to see her.
But wait, there's more!! Just when you didn't think it could get any better...we get to take the class gerbil home for Spring break!! Oh goodie!!!!! The rodent wasn't home for an hour and Rosie (our cat) pushed her cage off of the dresser and smashed it into a thousand pieces. Oh, such a joyful time. Time to go to Walmart and buy a new cage!!
In her words...
bkrogalske@sbcglobal.net
03/27/2007 10:08 PM
Hi everyone,
Round two went about the same as the first. After the pre-medications before chemo I fell asleep and stayed that way for most of the time. I am doing well, just a bit sleepy. I was excited that I could make it to parent/teacher conferences tonight and the kids are doing great.
We were able to get my CA125 level back (the level of cancer). Originally before surgery it was 2300. At my first chemo it was 780 and at today’s chemo it was 380. After one treatment the level was cut in half! This is a very encouraging sign and we were thrilled. Well, Brian was . . . . unfortunately I was heavily drugged and it took me a while to realize the importance of that number.
The kids will be doing a lot of coming and going to friends houses for play dates and sleepovers over spring break and are very excited. I am hoping that this beautiful weather sticks around for a while. Here’s some prayer requests to end with:
*able to tolerate side effects – extreme fatigue and aches – and that they will be minimal
*kids will do well and stay healthy – safe travel
*I have pain in my right knee that comes and goes (I’ve had it since way before all this). After the last chemo treatment I had a lot of pain especially when I am laying down and it keeps me awake. Please pray that pain will be less this time
*huge praise for the CA125 level!!!!!
*day to day focus – I have been struggling with this lately
Thank you for all your prayers. I don’t know what I would do with out them. I was thinking about all the people this goes out to and all the people they send it out to and so on. If we put all of you into a room it would be packed! That thought reminded me of the commercial for the cell phone company with the network all standing behind the person on the cell phone. You are all my network! That is a great word picture for me on the days I’m feeling all alone. Thanks for being my awesome prayer warrior network!
Kristi
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
Wednesday, March 21, 2007: Update From Kristi
bkrogalske@sbcglobal.net
03/21/2007 12:02 PM
Hi Everyone,
Sorry for the delay with this update. Yesterday went much longer than expected. It looked like I was going to be spending the night but fortunately I was able to walk around a bit and ate some food so they felt comfortable letting me go home around 8:30. I shared a room with another patient who was rather chatty so I was thrilled to be going home and able to get a good nights sleep.
The surgery went well. The doctor was not happy with all the scar tissue that he found though from the previous surgery. The port was put in, however, I will only be receiving chemo in my chest port next week. The following week I need to go to the hospital and have dye put into the stomach port and then have a scan or ultrasound to find out how effective the port is with all the scar tissue that is in the way.
I am in quite a bit of pain today. They said it would feel like someone kicked me in my ribs but they forgot to mention that it would feel like that person kicked me repeatedly! Other than the pain though I am doing quite well. Just a bit sleepy. I am so grateful to all our friends and family who have taken the kids for us the past few days so that I can have recovery time.
Please pray that this pain will go away soon and I will recover so that I am ready for the round of chemo next week. The kids seem to be doing really well. We have even seen an improvement in Nathan’s attitude. Unfortunately Emily has come down with a cold. Usually that means some difficult nights for us. Please pray that she will kick it soon.
I am feeling quite sleepy and the Vicodin is still making me groggy so I’m going to grab a nap now. It’s a great dreary and rainy day for a nap! Thank you for keeping all of us in your prayers.
Love,
Kristi
03/21/2007 12:02 PM
Hi Everyone,
Sorry for the delay with this update. Yesterday went much longer than expected. It looked like I was going to be spending the night but fortunately I was able to walk around a bit and ate some food so they felt comfortable letting me go home around 8:30. I shared a room with another patient who was rather chatty so I was thrilled to be going home and able to get a good nights sleep.
The surgery went well. The doctor was not happy with all the scar tissue that he found though from the previous surgery. The port was put in, however, I will only be receiving chemo in my chest port next week. The following week I need to go to the hospital and have dye put into the stomach port and then have a scan or ultrasound to find out how effective the port is with all the scar tissue that is in the way.
I am in quite a bit of pain today. They said it would feel like someone kicked me in my ribs but they forgot to mention that it would feel like that person kicked me repeatedly! Other than the pain though I am doing quite well. Just a bit sleepy. I am so grateful to all our friends and family who have taken the kids for us the past few days so that I can have recovery time.
Please pray that this pain will go away soon and I will recover so that I am ready for the round of chemo next week. The kids seem to be doing really well. We have even seen an improvement in Nathan’s attitude. Unfortunately Emily has come down with a cold. Usually that means some difficult nights for us. Please pray that she will kick it soon.
I am feeling quite sleepy and the Vicodin is still making me groggy so I’m going to grab a nap now. It’s a great dreary and rainy day for a nap! Thank you for keeping all of us in your prayers.
Love,
Kristi
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
Tuesday March 20, 2007: Port Number 2
Today Kristi gets her intra-peritoneal port (I/P port). We’re hopeful the doctors don’t find any tumors larger than 1cm. The I/P port chemo treatments don’t work on tumors larger than 1cm. They will also do exploratory surgery today to see if the cancer has spread. So a very anxious day for us. We had to be at Blodgett Hospital at 7:55AM! We checked in and everything went per schedule. We met with Dr. Downy before surgery and he reviewed what he was going to do. At about 8:30 the anesthesiologist gave Kristi her “happy medicine” and off she went. Denny waited with me in the waiting room the entire time. After about 2 hours I became very fidgity. Finally, after nearly 3 hours Dr. Downy came out after surgery and met with me and Denny. To say I was a wreck was an understatement. I was shaking and felt like I was going to throw up. Dr. Downy looked at me and asked “are you OK?” Dr. Downy’s demeanor was very downcast. I thought he was going to drop another bomb on me. Just the way he walked up and started talking I was waiting for the bomb to drop. The conversation was very unusual. He seemed very annoyed. Apparently there was a lot of scar tissue that may hamper the effectiveness of the I/P port. Was I supposed to be sorry for this?! The port went in, but we won’t know if it will work until they do a distribution test in 2 weeks. According to Dr. Downy, there was an “excessive” amount of scar tissue. It was so excessive it fused together some of her intestines. What may happen is that the chemo might “pool” up in some of these pockets. This stuff is so toxic that that would be a bad thing. So, they have to do this distribution test for a “trial run”. Dr. Downey also removed the nodule that formed in the spot of her laproscopic surgery port.
Kristi came out of the recovery room at about 1:00PM. Denny stuck around long enough to say ‘hi’ to Kristi, then he took off. It looked like we were going to spend the night. Because of the amount of scar tissue, Dr. Downy said Kristi would be quite sore and probably require and overnight stay. Unfortunately, they stuck us in a semi-private room. Yes, we had a roommate…and a very chatty one at that!! Kristi rested most of the afternoon, but by 5:00 she wanted to get up and walk around. Dr. Downy came in about 5:30 and met with us again. This time he was much more cordial. He didn’t really have any more news for us. He just elaborated again on how much scar tissue she had. Overall, he seemed happy with how the surgery went. He said if Kristi was up to it we could go home. Kristi didn’t even hesitate…”let’s go!” Here's a picture of Kristi waiting to get discharged...
Kristi came out of the recovery room at about 1:00PM. Denny stuck around long enough to say ‘hi’ to Kristi, then he took off. It looked like we were going to spend the night. Because of the amount of scar tissue, Dr. Downy said Kristi would be quite sore and probably require and overnight stay. Unfortunately, they stuck us in a semi-private room. Yes, we had a roommate…and a very chatty one at that!! Kristi rested most of the afternoon, but by 5:00 she wanted to get up and walk around. Dr. Downy came in about 5:30 and met with us again. This time he was much more cordial. He didn’t really have any more news for us. He just elaborated again on how much scar tissue she had. Overall, he seemed happy with how the surgery went. He said if Kristi was up to it we could go home. Kristi didn’t even hesitate…”let’s go!” Here's a picture of Kristi waiting to get discharged...
Thursday, March 15, 2007
Thursday, March 15, 2007: The Day After
So the kids saw mommy today without hair. They did OK. Ashley wanted to see her bald head. Nathan did not...so we didn't force the issue. Ashley did OK. It will take some getting used to. It doesn't bother me too much. I think she looks kinda cute!! I won't make any Demi Moore or Sinead O'Connor comparisons to avoid getting into trouble, but...
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
Wednesday, March 14, 2007: She's Bald
Her last picture with hair
Well, tonight we waited until after we put the kids to bed, then I shaved my wife's head. Talk about depressing. Imagine grabbing a razor, put a no. 2 adapter on it, then shaving your wife's hair off. It didn't stop there. Next we walked over to the kitchen sink and as Kristi bent over the sink, I bic'ed the rest of her hair off...down to a shiny cue ball. Kristi's hair was hurting her. It was falling out in chunks at this point. It was only a matter of a week or so and the rest of it would have fallen out. So she asked me to shave it off hoping this would help with the pain. When we were done she went to the bathroom to dry off. Of course there were tears. Lots of them. Why wouldn't there be? This sucks.
Wednesday, March 14, 2007: Update
Hi everyone,
We had a doctors appointment this afternoon to find more out about my surgery next Tuesday where I am scheduled to have my stomach port put in. It will be done by laparoscopic surgery. They will also look around for any signs that the cancer has spread. We are hoping that they will find nothing. If they find small spots they will still go ahead as planned. If they find larger spots or any tumors, they will not put the stomach port in. The chemo they put through the stomach port will only work on spots that are one centimeter or smaller. As of my first surgery, all the spots that were bigger than that were removed and hopefully that is still the case.
On another note, my hair is falling out very quickly. It started a little bit Sunday night and has gotten worse. Simply running my hand through it pulls out clumps. I am going to have Brian buzz it off tonight. I hate to do it but it is driving me crazy and it is also painful at the roots right now. Ashley is having a very hard time with this. I told her tonight that when she sees me in the morning my hair will be gone but I will have a hat on. I am struggling with this as well. I’m sure in time me being bald will be normal but right now it is the next big change.
I have been feeling pretty good these days. I still get tired quicker than I used to and I have aches and pains occasionally. I am still enjoying my surgery free days though. Here’s a new list of prayer requests for you:
*that we will all adjust soon to my new appearance
*I am especially worried about Ashley lately. She is having a lot of tears with me and said she doesn’t want to talk to anyone else about it. Please pray that I will have the right words to comfort her.
*We have had a lot of germs through the house lately but they seem to be on the way out – yeah!! Pray that I will continue to stay healthy.
*my surgery is scheduled for 8:30 AM on Tuesday, the 20th. Pray that no more cancer will be found and that the procedure will go well and I will heal quickly.
*as always, continued focus on the day to day
Thank you so much for your continued prayers. The support we have still continues to amaze us. You are awesome friends and family!!
Love & Hugs,
Kristi
We had a doctors appointment this afternoon to find more out about my surgery next Tuesday where I am scheduled to have my stomach port put in. It will be done by laparoscopic surgery. They will also look around for any signs that the cancer has spread. We are hoping that they will find nothing. If they find small spots they will still go ahead as planned. If they find larger spots or any tumors, they will not put the stomach port in. The chemo they put through the stomach port will only work on spots that are one centimeter or smaller. As of my first surgery, all the spots that were bigger than that were removed and hopefully that is still the case.
On another note, my hair is falling out very quickly. It started a little bit Sunday night and has gotten worse. Simply running my hand through it pulls out clumps. I am going to have Brian buzz it off tonight. I hate to do it but it is driving me crazy and it is also painful at the roots right now. Ashley is having a very hard time with this. I told her tonight that when she sees me in the morning my hair will be gone but I will have a hat on. I am struggling with this as well. I’m sure in time me being bald will be normal but right now it is the next big change.
I have been feeling pretty good these days. I still get tired quicker than I used to and I have aches and pains occasionally. I am still enjoying my surgery free days though. Here’s a new list of prayer requests for you:
*that we will all adjust soon to my new appearance
*I am especially worried about Ashley lately. She is having a lot of tears with me and said she doesn’t want to talk to anyone else about it. Please pray that I will have the right words to comfort her.
*We have had a lot of germs through the house lately but they seem to be on the way out – yeah!! Pray that I will continue to stay healthy.
*my surgery is scheduled for 8:30 AM on Tuesday, the 20th. Pray that no more cancer will be found and that the procedure will go well and I will heal quickly.
*as always, continued focus on the day to day
Thank you so much for your continued prayers. The support we have still continues to amaze us. You are awesome friends and family!!
Love & Hugs,
Kristi
Friday, March 9, 2007
Friday, March 9, 2007: Stop Worrying!!
bkrogalske@sbcglobal.net
03/09/2007 03:03 PM
Hi everyone,
It’s been a while since my last update so I thought I’d better catch everyone up! This week has been a great one. I am able to do almost anything – even my lifting restrictions are done today. I still don’t have all my energy or stamina back but am pretty close. My next surgery (for my stomach port) is on 3/20 so that means I have ten more days of feeling normal! I have to go in for blood work every week but that’s no big deal now. I used to be afraid of needles! The thought of IV’s still horrifies me but blood draws are a piece of cake!
We are fairly germ free in our house right now. Ashley has a sinus infection but is finally starting to get over it. My immune system is very low right now because of the chemo so I have to be careful this weekend. Brian is sweet enough to be bringing the kids to the Fun Night at their school tonight. If you haven’t been to a Fun Night, they are anything but fun! Well, except for the kids. Emily and I are having a girls night at home. I am enjoying being able to do so much now with the kids. I felt so useless when the chemo knocked me down. I had about four days of extreme fatigue but couldn’t sleep, aches and pains and a heavy fog hanging over me. I can’t say I’m looking forward to that again but I’m glad that I’ve been through it once and know that the tired time will eventually end.
I am so thankful for all the help we have. I am especially thankful for Brian with all that he has taken on especially on my down days and he does it with a smile. Our friends and family have been amazing and jumping in to help whenever we need it. I still get cards in the mail every day (which are a wonderful offset to the bills!). I still continue to be amazed and humbled at the many people praying for me – people I haven’t even met before. I can honestly say that having cancer has had a very positive effect on my life. I know it sounds crazy but I have grown so much in the past six weeks and our family has too. We have grown so much closer.
I know there are a lot of you out there still worrying about me. Please don’t worry! I am in good hands and continue to believe completely that I will beat this illness. I have no doubts. It will be a long and bumpy road this year but I will come out of this a brand new shiny person. I know a lot of people have said that they feel helpless and don’t know what to do for us. Just know that the thing we need most is prayers and if you’re doing that for us – you are doing a lot! Speaking of prayers – I’ll end with the specifics.
*I will continue to enjoy this "normal" phase that I am in right now and appreciate every minute of every day.
*that we will continue to stay healthy
*I continue to have "sticking" issues with my bag but it is getting better
*my hair will be falling out within the next week or two - the kids are having a hard time thinking about this and the closer it gets, the more I struggle with it
*that I will continue to get stronger so I am ready for the next surgery
*that all the people that I care about will be able to feel the same peace about this cancer that I do
Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!!
Love & Hugs,
Kristi
03/09/2007 03:03 PM
Hi everyone,
It’s been a while since my last update so I thought I’d better catch everyone up! This week has been a great one. I am able to do almost anything – even my lifting restrictions are done today. I still don’t have all my energy or stamina back but am pretty close. My next surgery (for my stomach port) is on 3/20 so that means I have ten more days of feeling normal! I have to go in for blood work every week but that’s no big deal now. I used to be afraid of needles! The thought of IV’s still horrifies me but blood draws are a piece of cake!
We are fairly germ free in our house right now. Ashley has a sinus infection but is finally starting to get over it. My immune system is very low right now because of the chemo so I have to be careful this weekend. Brian is sweet enough to be bringing the kids to the Fun Night at their school tonight. If you haven’t been to a Fun Night, they are anything but fun! Well, except for the kids. Emily and I are having a girls night at home. I am enjoying being able to do so much now with the kids. I felt so useless when the chemo knocked me down. I had about four days of extreme fatigue but couldn’t sleep, aches and pains and a heavy fog hanging over me. I can’t say I’m looking forward to that again but I’m glad that I’ve been through it once and know that the tired time will eventually end.
I am so thankful for all the help we have. I am especially thankful for Brian with all that he has taken on especially on my down days and he does it with a smile. Our friends and family have been amazing and jumping in to help whenever we need it. I still get cards in the mail every day (which are a wonderful offset to the bills!). I still continue to be amazed and humbled at the many people praying for me – people I haven’t even met before. I can honestly say that having cancer has had a very positive effect on my life. I know it sounds crazy but I have grown so much in the past six weeks and our family has too. We have grown so much closer.
I know there are a lot of you out there still worrying about me. Please don’t worry! I am in good hands and continue to believe completely that I will beat this illness. I have no doubts. It will be a long and bumpy road this year but I will come out of this a brand new shiny person. I know a lot of people have said that they feel helpless and don’t know what to do for us. Just know that the thing we need most is prayers and if you’re doing that for us – you are doing a lot! Speaking of prayers – I’ll end with the specifics.
*I will continue to enjoy this "normal" phase that I am in right now and appreciate every minute of every day.
*that we will continue to stay healthy
*I continue to have "sticking" issues with my bag but it is getting better
*my hair will be falling out within the next week or two - the kids are having a hard time thinking about this and the closer it gets, the more I struggle with it
*that I will continue to get stronger so I am ready for the next surgery
*that all the people that I care about will be able to feel the same peace about this cancer that I do
Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!!
Love & Hugs,
Kristi
Friday, March 2, 2007
Friday, March 2, 2007: Zzzzzzzzz
bkrogalske@sbcglobal.net
03/02/2007 12:36 PM
Hi everyone,
Just a quick update to let you know I need some prayers. I am extremely tired today (and was yesterday as well). This is normal and is a crash from the steroids that they gave me. Hopefully it will be better tomorrow. It is very frustrating feeling so useless. So rather than continue my pity party, I am asking that you pray that my energy will come back and my appetite as well.
I would also like to share how wonderful my husband is. Not only did he get all three kids up and ready this morning, he even had time to sit on the couch with them and read a devotional! When I get the kids to the bus stop it’s absolute chaos! Also, he fed them supper last night and got them all showered and tucked into bed with out my help. He gets the super-dad award from me! Please also keep him in your prayers as even super-dad’s need God’s help!
Sorry to keep this short but I am just so sleepy and the letters are starting to blur.
Thank you for praying!
Love & Hugs,
Kristi
03/02/2007 12:36 PM
Hi everyone,
Just a quick update to let you know I need some prayers. I am extremely tired today (and was yesterday as well). This is normal and is a crash from the steroids that they gave me. Hopefully it will be better tomorrow. It is very frustrating feeling so useless. So rather than continue my pity party, I am asking that you pray that my energy will come back and my appetite as well.
I would also like to share how wonderful my husband is. Not only did he get all three kids up and ready this morning, he even had time to sit on the couch with them and read a devotional! When I get the kids to the bus stop it’s absolute chaos! Also, he fed them supper last night and got them all showered and tucked into bed with out my help. He gets the super-dad award from me! Please also keep him in your prayers as even super-dad’s need God’s help!
Sorry to keep this short but I am just so sleepy and the letters are starting to blur.
Thank you for praying!
Love & Hugs,
Kristi
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