What a beautiful day! My energy level is up higher than it has been since before my first surgery and this weather is making my spirits soar! I hope you are all being blessed by such a wonderful day as well. I wanted to e-mail you about the fasting and praying that many of you are doing. Unfortunately because of my health I am not able to fast. In fact, I need to be doing the opposite – eating like crazy! I lose weight with every chemo and need to put those pounds back on. So, I have been doing the opposite of you and praying every time I eat. I am also praying every time my prayer pager goes off. Needless to say, many prayers are being said! I had a friend call this morning and told me she got a busy signal three times this morning for the prayer pager! Unreal. I am praying that this time of fasting will bring you closer to God and be an awesome experience for you.
Also, last night we had members of the shepherding elders care team come over as well as our small group to pray for us. What an awesome experience. Prayers were offered for complete healing and I have no doubt that I will be completely healed of this disease. It was awesome timing to have that coincide with the fasting time of prayer. (Actually, it was God’s timing!).
I have already said that if I had a chance to go back and never have this happen I wouldn’t. I can also say now that this cancer has blessed me and I am thankful for it. I don’t know why God chose to use me but I am honored. So much good has come through this cancer. So many lives have been affected. I can hardly remember the hospital stay and surgeries and painful times from all of this. God has put the blessings above all that. I have had the song Trading My Sorrows going through my head quite a bit today. Here are some of the lyrics:
I’m trading my sickness, I’m trading my pain, I’m laying them down for the joy of the Lord. I’m pressed but not crushed, persecuted but not abandoned, struck down but not destroyed. I am blessed beyond the curse for His promise will endure that his joy is going to be my strength. Though my sorrows may last for the night His joy comes with the morning!
Words of songs have had so much more meaning for us lately. The line that says “I’m laying them down for the joy of the Lord”. He is joyous that I would surrender my sorrow and sickness to Him. I don’t know anyone else that would want them! Not only does God take them but He does so joyously!
Many of you may not now that most of my life I struggled with anxiety and depression even to the point of medication and counseling. I haven’t had a single episode since the cancer! I am no longer on medication and am feeling better emotionally than I have my entire life. When I was little I always wanted to be a social worker or something that would help people. Unfortunately my low self-esteem along with my other issues didn’t allow that type of job. I have a new sense of self worth now and am looking forward to the chance to help others that are dealing with cancer or any type of illness. I have learned so much through my experience and want to share it with others. Thank you so much for being a part of this journey and shining with us!
Love & hugs,
Kristi
