I am just wondering how many of you would like some cheese to go with my whine. Wow, I read my post from yesterday and I was so whiny! I'm not so sure about this honesty thing - it's almost too easy to do on a blog. Now I've gone and blown the secret that I'm not perfect :)
I am doing much better today and have a better attitude. I am reading the book of Exodus today since yesterday I sounded like the Israelites when they were grumbling as they were being led out of Egypt. All those miracles and they still whined. The fact that I am still alive is a miracle in itself and that is just one of the many miracles God has showed us over the past couple years. And still I whine. Like I said in yesterdays update, I am so thankful that God is forgiving. What I forgot about was the fact that first I need to ask Him to forgive me.
I've finally wised up and invited Jesus to my pity party and what a difference that makes. Instead of having guests like fear, anger and dread I have peace, hope and grace. Much better guest list. I have been so wrapped up in myself that I haven't asked for prayers for anyone except myself. On that note, here are a few specific areas for prayer:
*Brian - he still struggles with the tiredness. He has good days and bad days as we all do. The pressure to be the provider especially in this economy is draining. I'm sure watching me go through this has to be so difficult. He never ceases to amaze me.
*Ashley, Nathan & Emily - for courage as we start this next round with chemo. They are doing so well with it but every once in a while it just hits them. We have been more open with them and are not hiding our tears as much. They understand the seriousness of this and yet they also know how powerful God is. I can't wait to hear from them some day when they are older how this journey has shaped them.
*Papi - yup, the family dog. I don't really have any prayer requests for him but didn't want him to feel left out :) He has been such a blessing to us! The night that we were all crying after hearing the news we had Papi running around licking our tears as fast as he could! You can't cry and laugh at the same time and his persistence just makes you have to laugh. Should this chemo cause fatigue I know Papi will be there curled up on my lap with me.
My sister and her family - I don't know how Lori & Eric do it. If you are new to our blog you can click on the link on our page to read their blog. They have their good days and bad days just like us and they are such a great example of peace during the midst of a storm.
My parents (Steve & Linda) - how do you watch your daughters go through such life changing events? I'm sure the urge to protect your children from anything bad never goes away. Even after they have grown up and started a family of their own.
All my friends and family - I know they all want to "fix" this for me. Pray that we will understand that there isn't anything to fix - just a journey to be walked through . . . together.