|grieve 1 (ɡriːv)|
|1.||to feel or cause to feel great sorrow or distress, esp at thedeath of someone|
That's the definition of 'grieve' according to dictionary.com. Yup, that's an accurate description. The pain is still very raw. Today, I turned around in the bathroom and I saw some of her jewelry hanging on a stand on the counter. Seems like just yesterday she was wearing that. That led into me sorting through all of her jewelry...including the little pouch that the funeral home returned Friday. Inside the pouch was her wedding ring and what she had on at visitation.
22 years ago tonight Kristi and I met in Grand Haven. I was driving the circuit with a friend and she was walking the boardwalk with a friend. I shouted something really smooth out the window as we drove by and I had her hook, line and sinker! (I believe it was something like "hey babe!"). The rest, as they say, is history. I only remember the date because it is exactly 6 months to Christmas...and of course, Kristi bought me a 6 month anniversary present...on Christmas day...and I said, 'um, whuuut?' So that's how I always remembered our meeting date. But, in my defense, her birthday is December 17. So, I had to cover her birthday (which she made perfectly clear on our 2nd date - you NEVER combine a birthday present and Christmas present), and Christmas! There's no way she could have expected me to remember our 6 month anniversary date, right?! I didn't think so either!
It's been another tough week. So many things around the house remind me of Kristi. Jewelry, clothes, books, hand written notes to remind her to do something, her last scribbles she made in her final days, etc. Everything. I was describing to a friend the other day that everything in this house is Kristi. Every time I turn around there she is. It seems like yesterday she was walking through this house. It all happened so fast.
We did get out Wednesday and visited some friends at a cottage they rented. A day of sea-doo'ing, tubing and fun was just what we needed. On the ride home Ashley said, "Dad, that was the funnest day of summer break!". We need more of those days!
Nathan, me, and Ashley